Wondering about...a new website

The learning curve was steep, but my website, companionway.org, is now up. Luckily I found a host with “drag and drop” components and an option for paying one time for unlimited help to get started (they lost money on me!). The website is only 4 pages but hopefully contains enough information to help people who would like to know more about this fledgling consulting business to connect with me. Many thanks to my collaborator, Anne Reed, who patiently checked what was written and listened with patience and encouragement to all my dilemmas!

And now, please check it out and let me know what you think. I’m wondering: Is it clear and concise? Does it convey the both the breadth and focus of the work we want to do with Mutual Ministry churches? What more would be helpful?

If you have feedback, please share it with me. Having never had a baby website before, I need all the advice I can get! Thanks in advance…..

Wondering about...Community Organizing and the Church

I was asked to teach a week-long seminar on Community Organizing in the Doctorate of Ministry program that SWTS and CDSP (both Episcopal seminaries) share this summer. I agreed with some trepidation. I myself had been educated in the traditional manner with a ten day IAF (Industrial Areas Foundation) training, but used these skills exclusively to develop the Church, either in individual congregations or to strengthen dioceses. I have never been a “true” community organizer. In my last posting, I wondered if what I had to offer from the church perspective would be acceptable to the students. To my surprise, it turned out to be the greatest advantage I had with my class.

Seven out of my eight students were present because Community Organizing (CO) is a required course in this DMin program (which, in my opinion, was one of the best decisions made when the program reconfigured in 2009). Several participants had some prior experience with CO, including a former member of a state legislature who had been on the receiving end of a Public Action. They began the week, in fact, with a pervasive sense of distrust in what was seen as the excessively aggressive tone of most community organizers, as well as skepticism about the ability to apply any of CO theory to developing leadership or community in the Church. I am pleased to say that by the end of the week this attitude had changed…but I am left with uneasiness about the assumptions that are being made by both community organizers and church leaders which are misleading and divisive in a world which could surely use more cooperation between these two groups which share many similar values and goals.

One of these assumptions is made in CO circles and has to do with the concept of private VS public motivations. As I was taught this polarity in 10 day training, the different reasons for engaging in private relationships (unconditional love, loyalty, acceptance) differ dramatically from the reasons to have public relationships (respect, no permanent allies or enemies, actions). It is very important to be clear about which sphere of life you are engaging in, in any given relationship, or confusion and conflicting motivations will subvert and undermine your goals.

In this polarity I think CO groups have articulated a very important and illuminating reality. The problem is that they have put the Church squarely on the public side of the polarity and have no patience with congregations which primarily see themselves relating as a private family…which in my experience is the orientation of the majority of mainline churches. Therefore, the CO community chooses to connect with only those parishes where there is either already a common understanding of the public nature of the Church’s role in the world, or where a few leaders will commit without the backing (or understanding) of the congregation. In the first case, this limits the CO group to a very few partners. In the second, it’s potentially divisive in a congregation. But most importantly, because of the CO attitude of dismissal and even judgment, it curtails the possibility that the “private” orientation congregations might be influenced to expand their understanding of God’s call to them and grow into that “public” motivation.

I actually think the CO view, that Church is a public institution and therefore needs to act out of public motivation, is correct but too narrow. The Church, I believe, is the one institution which straddles private and public relationships. It has a foot in both camps, as it were. We happen to be in a time when the mainline churches, at least, have made the mistake of focusing too much on the private side of life (and in their efforts to grow numerically continue to make this mistake by offering comfort rather than power… a topic for another essay). But the duality of private and public motivation for relationship is built into the DNA of Christianity, throughout our scripture and history. Instead of seeing it as a weakness or a mistake, this ability to live on both sides of the polarity may be the greatest strength of religious institutions. I wonder… what would the discussion look like if we were not trying to justify which side of the polarity Church belonged on, but instead were exploring together the strength of the dual nature of congregations? I wonder who that conversation would bring to the table….and if even community organizers might benefit from it?

Wondering about…Community Organizing as Congregational Development

I’m getting ready to teach a DMin seminar at Seabury Western Theological Seminary in a few weeks. The topic is the “churchy” side of Community Organizing and as I review what I will offer the participants, I am struck again by how useful this discipline is when seeking to develop a faith community. In Community Organizing speak, Churches are mediating institutions i.e. groups which pass on values and cultural norms to their members. In the past, the Church was a place to harvest and hone leaders who had a sense of responsibility to a wider world than just their family and friends. Those leaders would join with other leaders from other congregations to form the great organizations which could challenge the inequities of our society.

In this day and age, many churches have not passed on that value of striving for justice in the world, being content to care for a more intimate circle and keep the doors open. But the Gospel message is still being proclaimed, and is still being heard. The potential of members in a congregation to be mobilized to impact the world is still great. The value at the heart of the Gospel and in the midst of the sacraments (that God is with us and acting through us) is still vital. Therefore, the teachings of community organizing, their methods of developing leaders and thinking about how we act most powerfully on the values we hold, can be helpful for a congregation which is trying to grow up in its faith and act on its values. I do wonder, however, if this is the kind of “Congregational Development” church leaders want to learn about, or church members want to be challenged with.

My anxiety comes from personal experience of teaching this kind of class before. The issue seems to be that leaders are fine with learning about Community Organizing as something that happens outside the church, which they or some especially “outreach minded” members might want to be engaged in. What they have difficulty grasping is that for a church to grow in spiritual maturity, the questions Community Organizing asks about power and leadership and the world as it should be, must be engaged by the whole congregation…or at least a critical mass of the membership. There has to be a central movement within the church community, not an isolated and easily ignored sub-group, if it is to have any real impact on the development of the Church as a whole. That, I guess, is my dilemma: I hope the leaders of churches will engage in learning the art form that is Community Organizing because I believe it help the Church evolve into the body of Christ which it is called to be. But I wonder…is that what the participants of my class will be looking for? And if not, will I be able to give them a gift they are not asking for?

Wondering about...friendship as the basis for Mutual Ministry

It is common for Ministry Developers to acknowledge that the restructuring of congregations into a Mutual Ministry church, with more shared responsibility, must be based on relationships. I myself have made much use of this concept in drawing distinctions between hierarchical power (Power Over) and relational power (Power With) from the community organizing model. And many theologians point to the partnership commitment inherent in the Baptismal Covenant and the Trinity as models of this relational component. Yet we rarely, if ever, talk about the relationships which we base Mutual Ministry on as friendship.
It seems to me, however, that “friendship” is the particular relationship that the church (as it should be!) is based on. In John’s gospel, Jesus tells his disciples: “No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have from the Father I have made known to you.” (John 15:15) To be Jesus’ friend, and so by extension God’s friend and friends with each other, holds the promise of trust and intimacy which is so necessary for the restructuring of the communal lives of our congregations if they are indeed going to be capable of sharing ministry. Why then do we shy away from talking about the relationships we are building as friendships…and why don’t we emphasize the friendship component between Ministry Developer and church members, Bishop and staff people, and all the various hierarchical levels which can be redeemed only by friendship?
Perhaps it’s because, in the context of the Last Supper, friendship is much more than the comforting intimacy which we have come to expect in hymns such as “What a Friend I Have in Jesus”. For those of us who know the end of the story, this invitation to friendship took the disciples through the darkest nights of their souls…through the experience of fear and betraying and onto martyrdom. Their journey into the unconditional love of God, into the very heart of Christ, was not easy. And if Jesus is our model of friend, we must look at him on the bank of the Sea of Tiberius cooking breakfast for those who have denied and betrayed him, and even now have trouble recognizing him. Yet Christ’s friendship does not waiver. He reaches out to them, still inviting them to, “Follow me”.
Perhaps the question for the Church community is: Can we be such friends? The question is twofold: First can we be the kind of friend who, faced with our own weaknesses and imperfections, is willing to swallow our delusion and pride and try again to follow where Christ is leading, (to trust ourselves)? And, can we be the kind of friend who, after disappointment and desertion, can return with unconditional love to befriend a weak and imperfect being, (to commit to trusting others)? The ability to hold each other accountable for sharing ministry in congregations and in dioceses depends on the answers to these questions. I wonder if we are ready to ask them…..

Wondering about endings and beginnings

I like beginnings better than endings. In the past, I have been able to successfully focus more on the new job and community I’m going to than stewing too much on long good-byes. The transition I’m going through now is different though. I left my position as Canon for Ministry and Congregational Development for the Diocese of Wyoming on Friday…but I’m not leaving Wyoming. In fact, I’ll be staying in the same city while trying my hand at writing another book and beginning a consulting business (Companion Way…but more on that later). I’ll also be teaching a week in Seabury-Western’s doctoral program in June and hope to hook up with EDS’s online offerings at some point. In fact, I have a lot to look forward to, a lot to “begin”. But as I sit at my desk in my office loft, surrounded by files and boxes begging to put away, I am aware that this “ending” has been different and is ongoing, needing attention and care.
Usually, an ending for me has meant a leaving behind. So, moving from job to job I’ve left in my wake lots of unresolved relationships. The best advice the Church has to give priests who are moving on to different pastures is to not call, not go back for a visit, and not keep connections which may make it harder for people of your faith community to form a new relationship with the next priest to move in. While I have colleagues who struggle with or even ignore this advice, it’s always made sense to me. After all, my own need to form new connections and relationships took up most of my emotional energy. But staying in place calls for a transformation of relationships, which is much more difficult. Like most retiring priests, I will take a break from exercising sacramental ministries for a while…but that has not been the focus of my work for quite awhile, so I don’t dread this hiatus. What is difficult is to visualize where I do fit in the faith community now.

My hope is that I can find my place as baptized member and as friend. This should have been my identity all along, but after 30 years of being vicar, rector and canon these other titles have overshadowed and even sometimes obliterated the most central and fundamental relationship I’m called to in a community. No faulting is intended here…both I and others probably bear the blame. But the question lies before me, how to reclaim the most fundamental of identities among people who know me in other ways. I wonder…and I look forward to making a new beginning, here in an old familiar place on the foundation of a good and holy ending.

Wondering What's Next

My congratulations to John Smylie who has won the Bishop’s election in Wyoming! For awhile our paths ran parallel in this race, but now they diverge. The road before me beckons to explore where “losing” will lead me.

I have actually been on this road, or one similar, many times before. I know that each “losing” is also a gain…but knowing is not the same as having to go through the experience again. Like coming to terms with death (the most radical of losses), this journey has some familiar landmarks which must be passed.  For example, even though I knew I might find myself here when I began, there is no shortcut or bypass for mourning. I held a 36 hour vigil for this dead dream (actually a surprisingly short time for me!) and leave it now by the roadside with no regrets. I will most likely have to circle around and revisit this place, but I have done that before too and know it gets easier….

For now, I seem to be at that cross roads in the desert where many possibilities shimmer in the distance but none seem immediately accessible or urgent. There are loose ends to tie up, but time enough to tackle them and some that simply will remain undone. There is a freedom in losing which I will enjoy for a little while, until the next challenge presents itself. I will not go looking for it just yet.  I will wait and watch for signs in this wilderness, comforted by the certainty that no matter what direction I am called to take, if it is Christ who calls, that road will be the Way.

Wondering how to bottle hope and joy.....

In the midst of a tense two week period (after the Walk About and waiting for the Electing Convention), what a gift this last week-end has been! There was the ordination at St. Stephen’s, Casper on Saturday of two transitional deacons, Kay Flores and Tristan English. And then on Sunday, I was at Holy Trinity, Thermopolis to celebrate and preach, and generally be entertained by this energetic, multi-generational church which is in the midst of a process to call their local priests. What joy to see two congregations, which have slogged through their share of depression and pessimism, growing in confidence and a vitality which shows no signs of lagging! What a joy to share their journeys…..
If only I could bottle such a feeling to share with the churches which are presently struggling. It’s so hard, when the faithful core of a congregation see members slip away, when they have crises in leadership or don’t know how to pay the bills. We look for a quick fix because we need a quick fix! It feels sometimes like such churches are runaway stagecoaches…and, the truth is that there is no way to quickly turn around a stagecoach that has been running downhill, careening wildly out of control.  The first step is to get it stopped and insure the safety of the passengers. The second step is to assess the damage and get rid of extraneous baggage to lighten the load. Then finally, the laborious task of pushing the coach up the hill and getting it going on a healthy road can be accomplished.
We know this can happen with help from friends and neighbors. We may even suspect that God’s hand is in this precarious ride and that it will lead to new and better roads which help us on our Christian journey. But the gap between the bottom of the steep hill and the level road at the top is so great that often those at the bottom need a tonic, a stiff shot of hope, to help them get motivated. I wonder-how can we bottle such hope? How can the joy of congregations who have indeed found a healthy and vital way forward be shared with brothers and sisters in need?
Maybe one way to do this is to create a venue where congregations share where they are on their Christian journey-both the smooth roads and the difficult times. We have Mutual Ministry Reviews for individual churches, where what is going well and what is not are both looked at carefully, and from which much is learned. Could we do something like that on a regional level, maybe in the Apostolic Teams? It seems to me that somehow, on a yearly basis at least, the sharing of peaks and valleys that all congregations face might be just what we need to inspire hope and compassion between us. It may also be a good place to critique diocesan leadership whose ministry is to help all our churches on their journeys. When seen in the context of the whole region, such diocesan ministry may make more sense or, if not, adjustments may become evident. Something to think about….
But in any event, thanks to St. Stephen’s and Holy Trinity for the tonic of hope and joy they provided for me this week-end. I know that many others are inspired by their success as well.